WHEN I WAS NOT MYSELF
There is
beauty in my soul
And kindness
in my heart
A sadness for
mistakes I made
When I was
not myself
It’s easy to
go astray
And lose
oneself
When you
follow not your spirit
Or the
whispers in your head
The desire
not to hurt
Or disappoint
can overwhelm
The pressure
to fit in
The need to
belong
Can blind
you, so you cannot see
When you are
not yourself
I do not seek
to judge
Those I once
called friend
For I know
not their pain
Or what is in
their hearts
Nor could I
have sought the answers
When I was
not myself
I honor all
the memories
Of those that
I have lost
For even in
my anguish
I learned a
lot.
To listen to
the whispers
The screaming
of my spirit
Even when it
sees those things I wish weren’t so
I am grateful
to those who stayed
When I was in
the dark
It can’t have
been easy
But you
helped me find my way
As I walk
toward the light
And listen to
my soul
As it takes
the splendor in
And I become
myself
I’ll remember
those days of dark despair
When the
world closed in
A few scars
will remain upon my heart
From lessons
I have learned
When I was
not myself
I’ll not
judge myself
For those
mistakes I made
Nor flog my
spirit bloody
But take them
as lessons learned
For you
cannot go back
As I travel
on my path
Through the
deep dark woods
Muddy black
bogs of loss
As I make my
way back
Into the
beauty that I am
The darkness
and despair
The
loneliness and sorrow
Will be a
memory of the days
When I was
not myself
